The ISTJ profile includes a deep sense of duty, loyalty, and dependability. Learn the best ISTJ careers, how ISTJ relationships fare, and even about ISTJ famous people here. Sign In Join. PairedLife » Compatibility » Personality Type; ISTJ Personality: At Work, in Life, and in Love. While dating they tend to be relatively. I didn't come out until a few years ago, dated women up until then. I tried the gay scene for a couple years after coming out, but did not enjoy it. I will go to pride or a gay bar occasionally, but more and more prefer just a regular bar with a mix of people. Dating life is god awful. Aug 02, 2018 ISTJ. Top Stories About Love and Dating. Shop; What Is an Introvert? INTJ, Top Stories About Love and Dating August 2, 2018 August 2, 2018. 7 Secrets About Being in. This sub is open to all types. Check the and before posting. We have a INTJ Links: - a well-written and consistent description of the INTJ type and its functions. - an alternative description of INTJs in general. MBTI Links: - a test that calculates your most likely type based on function usage and developmental states. - a primer on Carl Jung’s theory of psychological types. - a helpful list of each type and their functional stack. - a graph showcasing the general rarity of each type. - a useful article on pitfalls to avoid when typing yourself. Filter by Topic: - - - - - - - - - - Related Subs: - - - Subs For Other Types: MBTI in general - NT “Rationals” -||| NF “Idealists” -||| SP “Artisans” -||| SJ “Guardians” -|||. As is probably typical with INTJs, I have a great career, and am generally happy in life, but I totally suck at dating. I'm in my 30s and have had a handful of short relationships, but nothing that's ever felt meaningful to me. I think it's a combo of too-high intelligence standards and feeling like the games and flirting that inevitably come with meeting someone new are a bit foolish. I'm the type of person who would love to fast-forward to the watching-TV-in-sweatpants-and-having-deep-conversations-on-the-couch phase, but it's so hard to get to that point without turning someone off in the process. I feel like I go out with guys and have a hard time with the BS flirty smalltalk of dating, and talking about 'real' things makes me a girl-next-door friend rather than a romantic prospect. Frankly, romance baffles me, and chivalry makes me uncomfortable. I'm decently attractive (and don't really have a problem finding a guy to sleep with, if I feel like it), but trying to be 'sexy' or girly and coquettish has always felt like a ridiculous act. For my fellow INTJ women who have found lasting love, can you offer any advice? The best advice which isn't really advice at all for the INTJ woman is this: find your mate in the educational system. Twink bros tumblr wallpaper. Being an INTJ woman in the dating field sucks after you've finished your education, because it's the number one place where you're likeliest to find a like-minded person who is also decently attractive. Every man I met that I actively and excitedly had a crush on (which was bizarre because we're usually as excited as a wet pool noodle) I met either through my program or just before entering my program. I don't want to suggest that men who don't attend university 'aren't smart enough' to date an INTJ woman, but men in university just seem to want to talk about things of interest more on those first and second dates than men who skipped university and either went into an applied college or the work force. Just based on personal human experiences and what intrigues them most. Plus, you get to skip all of that 'What do you do? Where do you study/work?' Stuff if they're from the same program as you! Which makes sense to most people - the whole 'once you're done with school, you get to stop using your brain' mentality plagues nearly everyone who is becoming an adult. Men who don't see you as an intellectual colleague will assume that you (as a woman) want to talk about those boring little date conversation starter topics. Those topics are really vital to a lot of people's dating lives - it's like their litmus test for a potential 'sit on the couch with me in my underwear' partner. But they don't have to be a part of your dating experience. If you're already out of the educational system, try and find something like it - look for potential mates in educationally-charged situations, like groups, clubs, and other associations who still make it their priority to learn as they get older and cut through the BS of life. I'm long since out of college and am well into my career (which I love), but it's a great idea to seek out intellectual types elsewhere. I've pretty much stuck to online dating, which has yielded mediocre results so far. Either I meet guys who turn me on but are boring, or, more often, guys who are really smart but do nothing for me physically. I've always been overinvolved in a lot of activities and clubs, but they're mostly in the arts. Which has given me a lot of wonderful gay men as friends, but very few romantic prospects, haha. I do live in NYC, though, which has plenty of smart men - maybe it's a matter of making myself go to more events like museum lectures or even bar trivia nights. It's that old 'I' in the INTJ that likes to stand in my way - I have to keep reminding myself that holing up at home isn't going to help my dating life.:) • • • • •. Its a common misconception that introverts can't be outgoing, they (and I) can be, its just very taxing and after a period of time, we need to crawl away and recharge. I've done presentations in front of an audience of hundreds, to fortune 50 executives and can be 'the life of the party' socially if its needed. I just have to rest and recuperate afterwards. If we were extroverts, this would charge us, make us feel better and more alive. Don't mistake a fear of crowds with introversion, theyre very different. I think you're right that the big thing standing in my way is simply putting myself out there to meet people. I don't have any social anxiety, it's more an exhaustion issue. Istj SexualityMy job can get stressful, and I go to the gym most days after work, so after all of that I'm just done and need to go home and unwind by myself. It's hard to prioritize going out when I feel like my life is already full. (Which I think is more of what I meant by wanting to be in the couch phase. That's easy to fit into my life, and I'd like to have someone to come home to and chill with. Istj ManGetting dressed up and made up to go out and impress someone is a whole different kind of energy.) And thanks for the flattery - actually helps a lot.;) Self-doubt sure likes to creep in when you've been single for so long. I'm trying to figure out the same things, where to find interesting people. Why won't they just label themselves with something. Yellow bands for singles. Sigh Anyway, I've stumbled upon a few posts made by more outgoing types and it seems they have the same problem, except they take every chance they can, they talk to everyone, consequently increasing the probability of meeting the right person. Obviously, their energy level doesn't suffer from this, but it's something that, I think, I might have to trade in.
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